Reverse Culture Shock

After 15 months of submersion in Korea it's a bit of trip to return to my home, Canada. This post will chronicle the things I once took little or no notice of.

018-Proudly Canadain


017-Clerk Clown


016-Happy Halloween


015-A House Cat


014-No Sandels No Drain


013-Napkins Replace Toilet Paper


012-Mozzarella Cheddar Gruyere Jack


011-A Drink From The Tap

I didn't die or get sick and it's damn hard to drink like this from a water cooler.

010-Just Imagine My Sandwich!

No - it's even better than it looks!

009-Where Is The Step Up?

No pile of shoes? No step up onto the main floor? Diiirrrrtttyyyy!

008-Dish Washer


007-Oven


006-Lawn


005-Nature I Can Touch From My Window

I woke up to this my first morning. Not only are there plans outside my window, I could jump out of my window without dying!

004-Only In Canada

Hockey and whales sharing the front page.

003-East Indian Cowboy Traffic Warden

So many characters in this land! I had some amazing portrait shots and later realized there was no memory card in my camera :(

002-Trucks


001-I Was Only Gone A Minute

This is one of the first thing I saw when I walked out of the Vancouver airport. In Korea the general rule seems to be if you can get your car on, under or into it - then park there. Tow trucks are only for removing wrecks.

Eat my Bread...

French toast is on the menu this morning.
The freshly baked loaf of bread was purchased in advance last night and set in the cupboard to dry. The anticipation built as I slept on the kitchen floor.

I awake to bread crawling with tiny red ants..

French toast is on the menu this morning.
Eat my bread you fucking ants! Borrow deep into it's fluffy holes and tunnels. Then my sticky egg batter can engulf you. Ant and unborn chicken will fuse together. I'm happy you've invaded my bread. A perfect substitute for my expired vanilla extract.

French toast is on the menu this morning... and it tasts amazing.

Motorbike 4 Sale

2004 250cc Hyosung Comet GT

7000km - Meticulously Maintained - Excellent Condition
New rear sprocket, drive chain and starter
Proper papers and documentation

Just returned from a 800km tour to the DMZ
Reason for selling: Time for a bigger engine!
Asking Price w2,000,000

Read my review of the bike "http://www.comatosed.ca/writing/writing/reviews/250_hyosung_comet_review.html">
HERE


Interested? Email me at gregsamborski@gmail.com

Videos

Cruise'n Gumi
Ripping around Gumi... WARNING: Video may induce nausea!


060315-Board Break'n Bikers
Watch Paul (Honda 125), Bryant (Hyosung XRX 125) and Greg-o (Hyosung Comet 250) tear up the streets in the quaint South Korean town of Gumi. These three English teachers haven't the first clue about stunt riding and this shines blatantly through all Greg's fancy editing work.


060123-PrimeWay
My daily ride to school...

Flyering High

The rock band and DJ gig were well received at Psycho last week. The Love Guns and Jack Coke got the crowd rocking from around 11:00-12:30. Their heavy sound filled the floor quickly with headbangers and jumpers. My self, Comatosed, and Dj SwampCat continued to rock the club until 6am. Midway through the night cloths started coming off and many sexy ladies (with the exception of Jason :) were up grinding on the bar and tables. The dance floor hosted a similar, slightly more explicit scene. When the music finally stopped fifteen or so of us saw the sun rise and went for some Sam Gyup Sa at my favorite dirty Sam Gyup Hut.

This weekend there'll be a new Dj in the mix. Shawna will be spinning Rap and HipHop, SwampCat will be laying down Drum & Base, Ragga Jungle and HipHop, and I will be flooding the floor with various funky, deep and progressive house tracks. I hope takes two restaurants to feed everyone this time around!

Here are the flyers from last week:

Don't Like Salty Culture

I was searching for my buddy Jason's Blog on Blogger. What I found was even better...

Ps. Just uploaded four 4 photo sets: Alice's Birthday / Bryan's Birthday and a Roof Top Party With Mexicans / A Hike Up GumoSan Mountain / Another Korean Wedding Bonus: Now visited links turn dark brown! How crazy is that!

For those with bad eyes::

"Hi,I am a Korean man,Jason. Are you interested in Korean man? I like russian girl specially because she is very intelligent and pure. I think that Russia is one of the best cultural nations which can not be compared with u.s.a. I don't like salty culture as like american culture.I believe the true traditional nation in this world is Russia. To talk about my character is a bit difficult for me, it is better to let other people do. All I can say about me is, I`m friendly, fair, honest and with sense of humour. But I`m sure you also will find some weak points.I am working in golf club. service manager. I hope to have a good relationships with you. Waiting for your reply witn my heart fluttered.Thnks."

Sunday Reading

I read a 140 page instruction manual last night. It wasn't one of those little pocket book kinds that you get with a new camera, those are the children's stories of the manual world. This was a full-on A4 sized novel with tedious, ambiguous and confusing instructions on how to use the latest Traktor Dj Studio software. It was a 5 star read, perfect for Sunday afternoon... a real cliff hanger. I managed to work through it all, performing each task as I learned it. What prompted me to spend my entire Sunday afternoon, almost 12 consecutive hours, with a manual?

I was at the local tavern, "Psycho", a few nights ago sharing some beers with my roommate, neighbor and girlfriend.  A Canadian-Korean teacher/rocker named Jason Jang told us he would be jamming with his band at the end of the month.  Just before he told me this, I had brought up the idea of getting some DJs (namely myself and room mate) with the bar staff. 

I've been wanting to DJ ever since arriving in Korea but have been to scared to switch from Dj-1800 (a very basic program) to Traktor (an unbelievably complex program).  Psycho bar was all over the idea of bring DJs in and Jang, the band member, said he'd put our names on the flyer!  I'm gonna have my FREAKING NAME ON A FLYER!!!   

The whole thing isn't actually as huge as I'm making it sound.  We're talking a crowd of about 30 if lucky... faces which are all familiar, and people who have had to learned to like anything Gumi has offer in the form of entertainment. You can't be too picky when there is only one club to choose from. Ahhh, it'll be intement.  Bryan and I are gonna funk-ify the dance floor before, between and after the band's sets.

Turn On The Radio

Alright, I'm back... Maybe this time to stay a little longer. I'm trying to convince myself it's not always necessary to post these epic long posts including photos, music, movies, links and all the rest. A few sentences can surely suffice.

The usual, methodical, indexed me would try to resume this blog where I left off more than a month ago. But not tonight. Instead, I'll share a little story from one of yesterdays classes.

There exists a switch class full of 14-15 year olds= middle school students... a class so unbelievably lifeless no description can do them justice. Fate would have it that I have to teach this comatosed class our most conversation oriented text. Fortunately, I only face this challenge once a week so I have plenty of time to prepare for an hour of dialogue with myself.

Something amazing happened yesterday though, I made a breakthrough! We're currently covering a unit about all movies. You know, "What kind's of movies do you like?", "I think romantic movies are boring" etc. I've tried to stimulate conversation every way humanly possible but it's difficult do discuss movies when students can't recall a single Korean movie title. I actually brought my computer into class, googled "Korean Movies" and went through each poster. I took a tally to see who had seen what. It turned out they'd seen all twenty movies on the page and this finding is definitely consistent with a student population that reports having eaten, slept, played video games and watched TV every weekend since my arrival one year ago.

The last time we did a partnered speaking activity I had to place Nike, Adidas (two of the more original names), K, L, M and B (these are really the names they chose...) into two rows facing each other just to get them to look at each other. I know these students are good people. I know each of them actually wants to speak but they're all too scared about what the other is thinking, they don't want to stand out. So even after I explained the simple task at hand fifteen different ways and resorted to using my hand as a puppet to illustrate a conversation they pretended not to understand... and I become even more determined complete my mission. Eventually, they got tired of standing, gave in, and quietly mumbled at each-other.

Well today I reminded this class I could organize them into two lines again if need be. Almost instantly they turned in their seats but no one had the courage to ask the first question, "Do you like dramas?". And right than I had an epiphany, I reached over to the cassette player and turned the radio on. I cranked the volume on the Korean talk show and said, "Don't worry, no one can hear you." And that's all it took... some noise, and they were chatting away. I sat and marked papers with my head down as not to make them nervous and they diligently interviewed their partners.

I'm not sure this technique will work every time... but even once is enough for me.

Too Hot To Blog

It's really too hot to do anything but drink cold beer. After just over a month of total lethargy I've managed to assemble one photo album. It's just some pictures of the Boryeong / Boryang Mud Festival we attended. I've written about half of the experience. Maybe I'll make finishing that pice my goal for August.

-Greg

Digital Suicide?

I'm beginning to grow uneasy. The structure my life is built around is due for an assessment. The sheer number of structural changes available to me are overwhelming. July 24th 2006 is a date as significant as any other in history for me. This is my D-Day - Decision Day - because my teaching contract is up.

Trying to figure out ones life is a daunting task. Rather than approach it strategically, one piece at a time I opt to start tapping out the Beats Per Minute of my entire music collection. I'll need to know this information once I live my dream of being an international DJ.

If tapping beats gets old I delve into iPhoto and begin managing my photo library. I upload my shots to Flickr in the hopes some amazing photographers will recognize my work and hire me on with National Geographic. A watched inbox never gets a message so I pass the time integrating those photos into this here web page because there are few things I enjoy more than writing HTML code, and I'm not even being sarcastic.

I'm not sure how clear it is to strangers reading this, but my friends and family know that my life 85% digital. Digital music, digital photos, digital movies, digital documents and digital communications. Lately I've considered quitting digital cold turkey. My room mate has his doubts about whether I'm capable of this kind of digital suicide. But he's also making offers on all of my gear.

For a long time I've daydreamed of returning to a simpler, more practical life. A life filled with more tangible things. I'm worried our generation will see a day when electronics become boat anchors; be it due to neutron bombs, energy exhaustion, global collapse, environmental rage... or Mr. Kim Il, my next door neighbor! If this happens, and even if it doesn't, what am I left with, both physically and mentally? Let's see:

I'll have beautiful aluminum Mac Power Book to grind my grains on. A MIDI Piano/Keyboard which makes absolutely no sound. Maybe if I ripped out the fake ivory keys I might be able to craft them into spearheads. Also, the rotary knobs world make good buttons! And then there are three MP3 players and 2 digital cameras I could easily throw and knock a small varmint out with. Or perhaps the lens on my SLR could be used as a spotting scope or to make fires!

I've been considering a transition as follows:
Typing -> Learning to write on paper again
Photos -> Learning to draw and sketch
Music -> Continuing with drumming and learning guitar
Net Research -> Reading books
Programing -> Gardening (hey, seeds are full of code)

There's only one problem, I'm having the time of my life here in Korea. The job and life style afford me the time and resources to do everything I enjoy doing. Every weekend there is a grueling selection process. Will I take trip somewhere in Korea, spend the weekend at home with my girlfriend, go surfing, play paint ball, go on a motor bike tour with the boys, go hiking, visit a festival, make tracks, do some photography, update the blog or drink myself silly. Usually I can't decide and it's a combination of all of the above.

Thus I may delay my digital suicide for one more year and live it up here in Korea. This'll buy me another year to figure out what I really want to do with my life... and that's what my generation is all about.

My Pants Caught On Fire

My Pants Caught On Fire

powered by ODEO

060618-060415: Sampled some whack interludes on my room mate's Beck CD which were the inspiration for this D&B track. Starting to better understand Reason. Think my production is getting better.

SoundClash 5 - SampleGration

Listen - Vote - Battle

SoundClash 4 - Evil Darkness

Listen - Vote - Battle

Funerals, Bikes and Swimming

I was reading my buddy Bryant's blog. He summed the day up so nicely I figured why reinvent the wheel...

"Then the motorcycle called. Greg, Will and I took off through country roads at breakneck speeds, breaking the thin pavement while taking turns like animals, frightening the locals and running over animals. Well not so breakneck..."

Read the rest here

Busan Breaks

Any ideas how my hands turned this color? No, I didn't dip them in the local river. Nor are they the result of pretending to be a muslim woman for a day. This is what happens when your wet-suit ends at the wrist.

The only thing which has mattered these past few weeks is surfing. My once new room mate, Bryan, spoke of nothing else since arriving here. Then his computer was delivered and surf videos began streaming day and night through my modem. Where as Bryan has done relatively little surfing Jason, my friend and previous room mate, has considerable experience.



Whenever Bryan and Jason communicated, 90% of the message had to do with surfing. Long after the parties at our place had ended these two would be sitting there, watching a surf vid on the lap top and throwing out all sorts of big names and surf jargon I could only pretend to relate to. One night Rory, another surf fanatic, stayed after our other friends and girlfriends got sick of surf talk and left. The four of us flipped through a surf magazine Bryan had brought with him. We gazed at the well worn pages, fantasizing about riding similar waves one day.



Then on May 5th Rory and Bryan set out on a mission to find waves. I only remember the specific date because I and many others suffered our worst hangover yet in this country. The previous night had been my birthday.



We all met at a local gravel pit, a pork restaurant with a gravel floor, and ended up drinking copious amounts of beer, soju (24% Rice Liquor)



and whatever else the locals encouraged us to drink that night.



Then we migrated to the park to drink more, play basketball and make music until four in the morning.



I met my girlfriend at the bus station at 8:30am, on the verge of death. The can of beer Jason prescribed for my hangover wasn't helping any. I slept the first 5 hours to the Tea Festival and came so close to barfing on the last bus I decided to sit on the steps next to the garbage can. As soon as Alice and I hit the hotel it was lights out for both of us.



That night the rain came with vengeance. It never stopped poring the entire trip.



We almost decided skip the festival but at the last minute we realized it would be stupid to skip the very thing we had come for.



So we endured the rain and actually really enjoyed the aesthetic it gave the place.





The journey home was much more pleasant.



Judging by the last time I'd seen Bryan - sleeping with the kitchen garbage can beside his bed and already quarter full of vomit - I figured he and Rory would have opted to stay home. But they had in fact gone - and found waves... and it had been even easier than anticipated. Their taxi driver not only knew where to take them, he gave them the low down on some super secret surf spots!

Since this day Bryan, Rory and I have gone surfing every weekend. Weather has suddenly become a whole lot more interesting to me. All of us are constantly up date on the marine forecasts looking at wave tables, tides and satellite imagery. The first weekend was gray and rainy but this meant the waves were peeking at 1.6 meters.



They were no good for learning, and we got absolutely pummeled by them but it was still a hell of a lot of fun.



Also, bad weather meant uncrowded beached which was nice. The water was cold enough that part of my feet went yellow-y numb by the end of my three hours, but I didn't come close to loosing them like Bryan had the previous weekend.

This last weekend was amazing. Alice and Jason joined us this time around. The waves were a little smaller than last time, 1.2 meters, but they were rolling in much nicer, great for learning.



Only this time is was sunny and 28 degrees so tons of Koreans and and half the US Army were holding the beech.



I never realized what a huge difference height makes when trying to make it past the break. Waves were hitting me in the wast and pushing me around a little but to Alice they were brick walls body checking and washing her up onto the shore. Nonetheless, she was a trooper and managed to catch a couple rides in before calling it a day due to exhaustion.

I found and named my favorite break out there this time. Not only did it have the best waves, it didn't have any current . The water had warmed up significantly, the whole experience was euphoric and thus I had no desire to leave. Things started coming together. I was learning how to read the waves and select the better ones. I got the hang of how to speed up and slow down when lying on the board. I even managed to stand up and ride an entire wave out before jumping around screaming with joy.



When I finally turned in I realized just how tiered I was. Alice, her friend and I had some dinner and then caught the train back home.



Now, I too, am becoming obsessed with surfing. Bryan now owns a board and is living his dream. I'm considering spending a week or two of being a surf-bum up in Busan. I've already checked the wave tables for text week and looks like 1.1 meters on Friday!

Sound Thoughts

It's never a dull moment when allowed a glimpse inside of the mind of a grade eight Korean student. A couple weeks ago I tried a new activity in my most advanced English classes. It would turn out to benefit both teacher and students. Students would have a chance to do some "free-writing" and try to translate music into words, meanwhile, teacher would get some feedback and much needed votes SoundClash.

The following is a copy of what my grade 8 English students wrote when listening to each track. Enjoy!

Jenny
AccentToGumo
deep sea, scary, (picture of lantern fish) a piano that one key doesn't work, a song that is one octave down, mechanical, violin + mechanical, cool waves (picture of waves), weird matrix, movie

*** 3 STARS

Harpyness
frog, funny kids, joke mischief, country, violin, climbing a mountain, bagpipe, skirts Scotland, frog, jump, zig zag, game
(pictures of a bagpipe and a frog jumping)
**** 4 STARS

LemonBot
stinky, farting, mechanic, a machine that is broken. echo, weird, alien, drain, sewer (picture of a mouse, can and sewer)

LemonPhase
echo, weird, dancing, a ball bouncing (picture of a bouncing ball)

--------

Min-O
AccentToGumo
mysterious, aquatic, ringing, submarine, underwater, radar, classical, piano, up and down, African drum beats, rhythmical, lively, all combined, violin, chasing, dancing, searching, weird, imaginary

Harpyness
funky, funny, slow, repeating, country like, D.J. song, harmony, cool, in the long highway, with an open car listening to this music, wild west, hiphop car, childish, jumpy, glueish

LemonBot
boinky, French, electric, bouncy, repeated, weird, phone call, prank, joke, horror movie, Armageddon, devilish, joke, hooking, heeping, fade out

LemonPhase
space, funky, beat box, ringing, talking

--------

Kate
AccentToGumo
temple, bells, ring, in the quite temple, ghost, scary, chilly, scary, a thief came into the store

Harpyness
entered into a game place
a famous chellist is playing fusion music
stuck in a puzzle

LemonBot
talk on the phone secretly
float on the moon
old game

LemonPhase
left in the jungle

--------

Melissa
AccentToGumo
cool, freaky, scary, in a dripping cave
bright sunlight comes out
drum - tropical island, a feast
suddenly - cyber place, someone chasing someone

Harpyness
funny harmonica
jumping, jump-rope or bouncing a ball
playing hide and seek
alien language
colorful

I like Harpyness better because it's fun. The first one is rather scary.

LemonBot
a horror movie, bad phone calls made by that man
I don't understand what he says
he's chasing me
arghhhhhhhh
he says a weird language I can't understand
weird freaky

LemonPhase
scary texture
squeeze slightly, right now
What is he saying?
If you have saliva?
I wrote what I heard